Losing Loved Ones

I know that this is something that so many people have to deal with in life. Myself included. In fact, I got the idea for this post when I was thinking about my grandfather who died 3 years ago. I started thinking about a lot of different things. I looked to the Bible, received quite a few answers, and had to ask myself a number of questions. As a result of this, this post is half Scripture and half experience. This post will talk about what the Bible says to do when you lose someone, about when you lose someone you love who didn't know Christ, about what to do concerning the person you love who does not know Christ, and how to move on.

The Old Testament tells of a time of mourning that God gave to the people. Deuteronomy 34:8 says,

The Israelites grieved for Moses in the plains Moab thirty days, until the time of weeping and mourning was over.

God gave His people a period of time to cry over the death of a loved one. Now do not think this means we are only to cry for the 30 days after the death. That is not the case. The 30 days are for crying over the loss of the person, not because we miss them. Remembering a person we love and crying for them because we miss them is in no way wrong. However, if you dwell on the death of the person, you are not doing as God wishes. Dwelling on the death of a loved one brings nothing good. We owe it to God and to the person we lost to get over their death, and move on with our lives. It is good to remember the person. I still remember things about my grandfather every so often, and sometimes I still cry. But, I would not change anything. Not even to gain more time with him. It was his time to go and I accepted that. It was hard to do. My grandfather and I had a special bond. We were very alike, and as I grow, I find myself growing into the same person he was. So it was definitely hard to accept that he was gone. But I did nonetheless. And so can you.

Now, for you Christians who lost a loved one who did not know Christ; I have something to tell you. Do not blame yourself. It is not your fault. Even if you did not go up to them and tell them about Christ. If they knew you were a Christian, they could have come up to you and asked you about Him. However, that is not an excuse to not go up to them and tell them who Jesus is. But if they refuse to listen, end your pursuit there. James 2:1-4 and Matthew 10:14 say,

My brothers, as believers in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ, don't show favoritism. Suppose a man comes into your meeting wearing a gold ring and fine clothes, and a poor man in shabby clothes also comes in. If you show special attention to the man wearing fine clothes and say, "Here's a good seat for you," but say to the poor man, "You stand there" or "Sit on the floor by my feet," have you not discriminated among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts?

"If anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words, shake the dust off your feet when you leave that home or town."

Let me explain these verses. The person with fine clothes is the person you want to go to heaven very badly because you love them. Like a parent, a sibling, a close friend, etc. The poor man is the stranger who you do not know, but who God is most likely wanting you to talk to instead. We cannot show favoritism among non-believers who we are suppose to talk about God with. If someone does not listen and flat out rejects what you have to say, shake the dust from your feet and move on. However, keep loving and praying for the person, that they may come to Jesus Christ one day.
Now, for those of you who have lost a person who did not know Christ as their Savior, again it is not your fault. Whether you talked to them about Jesus or not. I can't answer the question of why they did not come to know Jesus Christ before they died. I can't. I currently do not know whether or not my grandfather had accepted Jesus into his heart before he died or not. I like to think he did, but if he did not. Honestly I do not like to think about that. But, if he did not, then I have to remember that it was his choice, and I can't change that. Not me, or anyone else. It's another thing, that must be accepted along with the death of the person.

We cannot understand why the people we love have to die, knowing or not knowing what Jesus did for them. His plans and His love are beyond our knowledge. Romans 11:34 and Ephesians 3:19 say,

"Who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has been his counselor?"

To know this love that surpasses knowledge-that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

God's love and mind surpass our knowledge. Therefore, we cannot understand why things happen the way they happen. This is why we find ourselves angry at God and yelling at Him. Because He took the person we loved away from us, and gave us no reason for it.
I warn you that what I'm about to say might anger you, but it is true. When we yell at God for taking away someone we love, it is the same as when we are a 2 or 3 year old and our parents take away our blanket or bottle and we cry and yell at them because we do not know why they are taking away the things we are used to. They do it so that we might grow and mature. If a child is kept on the bottle too long, then they could end up with bad teeth when they are older. It is done to help the child grow up properly. It is done to help them later on in life. Jeremiah 29:11 says,

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."

If you lost someone recently, you're probably angry at me and think I am an idiot right now. If you lost someone a while ago like me, you most likely understand what I mean. When we lose someone, it affects us and our relationship with God.
When my grandfather died, I was not on the right path. But his death helped begin pushing me into a greater period of my life. It helped me grow in my faith in the long run. It led to starting this blog, and put me on the path I'm on now to entering into Theology. Even if you do not know the reason now, one day you will.

If you have lost someone and you still miss that person right now, do not think it is wrong to be yelling at God, or crying with God. God is our Father who loves us greatly, and who wants a relationship with us. He loves you and will always be with you. Luke 17:21 says,

"Nor will people say, 'Here it is,' or 'There it is,' because the kingdom of God is within you."

God's kingdom is in you, and he resides in you. God is always with you. God can bring you Joy in facing the death of a loved one, and He can help you persevere through it if you ask Him to. James 1:2-3, and Mark 11:24 and James 1:6 say,

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know the testing of your faith develops perseverance.

Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.
But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.

Ask God, with no doubt within you mind and heart, to give you Joy, in knowing that when all is said and done you will not have anymore pain, and to give you perseverance in this hard time; and He will gladly give it to you. And not only that, but He will make you stronger in the face of future trials in life. I tell you now that nothing is impossible with God. Matthew 19:26 says,

Jesus looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible."

Getting through the pain of losing a loved one is far from impossible with God. That is a fact I have experienced myself. You will get through it.

Everyone has had the experience of losing a loved one at one point in their life. But the day where we will not have to experience the pain of loss is at hand. Revelation 21:4 says,

"He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the older order of things has passed away."

So look forward to that day. But until that day, remember that God is always with you, and loves you. That everything happens for a reason, to help you grow along your journey to be with Him in Heaven. Remember not to dwell on the loss, but do remember the person and everything that you loved them for. Pray for those whom you want to experience Jesus Christ, and love them as much as you possibly can. Know that you are not the only one who loses loved ones, and their are people who know what you are going through, and that will help you through this. Have Joy in God's love and know that one day, one day! you will not have to experience pain any more for the rest of eternity! Because God will take away all the pain! Because He Loves You! Never forget that!

Footprints

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed he
was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. For
each scene, he noticed two sets of footprints in
the sand; one belonged to him, and the other to
the Lord.

When the last scene of his life flashed before
him, he looked back at the footprints in the
sand. He noticed that many times along the
path of his life there was only one set of foot-
prints. He also noticed that it happened at the
very lowest and saddest times in his life.

This really bothered him and he questioned the
Lord about it. "Lord, you said that once I
decided to follow you, you'd walk with me all
the way. But I have noticed that during the
most troublesome times in my life, there is only
one set of footprints. I don't understand why
when I needed you the most you would leave me."

The Lord replied, "My precious, precious
child, I love you and I would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering, when
you see only one set of footprints, it was then
that I carried you."

Thank You For Reading
Long Live Jesus Christ
Amen